When you decided you wanted to be a beauty therapist. Did you think it was a really glamorous exciting career? Well... as youll learn to know. It is exciting. But it's certainly not glamorous. Not all the time anyway. If you need a laugh, read this light hearted blog on the serious truth about being a beauty therapist. Grab a cuppa! Get comfy & let yourself laugh about the truth of being a beauty therapist.
The unglamorous side of the 'glamorous career'
- Beauty therapists are a strange species who survive off nothing but 36784 cups of coffee every day. But it's very rare we actually get to finish one full cup because we're so busy. Coffee is literally our staple diet. Maybe the odd bag of crisps and XL donut too if we're lucky. 🍩
- When you're a beauty therapist it's completely acceptable (only for us) to eat, pee and talk on the phone to our loved ones all at the same time! Don't lie and pretend you've never done this! Nothing will come in between me and my donut. Not even time out to pee in between clients. 🍩💧
- You walk around looking like a lost child whilst making everyone else look stunning! 🤣 You've sprayed dry shampoo into your hair for the 5th day running, your own tan is non existent and your shellac needed removed and reapplied 5 weeks ago but you just keep topping it up with normal polish of a similar colour, just winging at life everyday.
- You walk around half the week looking like an extra out of a Christmas advert, constantly covered head to toe in fucking holographic glitter. Every time you take your knickers off a mass of glitter falls out like you're a little gift wrapped present! How the fuck do you even get glitter IN YOUR KNICKERS! It gets everywhere though! Right ladies?
- Its literally impossible to carry out a lash tint without getting it all over your nails or hands.... so you walk around for 3 days looking like a teenager who's leaked ink from their biro on themselves! 😳
- Weve al had THAT moment. Particularly during a massage, a full body one. It's usually ALWAYS after lunch time (haha yeah lunch time.. more like coffee time) where you really...... really need to fart and you have to hold it in and you start thinking it's highly accurate that you look like Violet out of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory, when she blows up like a volleyball and turns bright purple. Just trying your hardest to keep your pump in.
- When it gets to holiday season and you're either not going abroad on holiday at all or you've still got 5 months of constant pedicures, fanny waxes and full body exfoliations to get through before you get to yours. So you start secretly thinking that the next time a client harps on about going on holiday for 2 weeks to Barbados, you're just going to botch their tan up and remove one eyebrow just out of pure jealousy. But then you remember the true professional you are, whip yourself in to shape and chat to Brenda about her 5 nights in Skegness that she's got booked in November. Talk about perspectives.
- As much as you adore your clients they can't half mess you about at times. You look at your diary for the next week thinking you've got it cushty, then all of a sudden it's like the universe whispers "haha like the look of that diary do you? Wouldn't it be a shame if I just MESSED IT UP FOR YOU" Suddenly you've got an avalanche of clients texting to reschedule because they are looking after their cousins, boyfriends uncles dog. You get clients cancelling or you get the ones who just don't turn up!!!! Ok thanks Mavis, I don't need to pay for my mortgage this month. It's cool.
- You seriously chuckle inside when your client comes in for a FACIAL. Thinking that the word facial is self explanatory, explain to them what you want them to do and you will pop back in 2 minutes once they're comfy.... only to go in and discover they are lying on their front.........🙄🤦🏻♀️ Okay no bother Betty, I'll just sit under the bed at the peephole will i and rub some cream on your face..
- As a beauty therapist you're so body conscious. Conscious your breath stinks or you have BO. So on the outside your reception desk looks immaculate to your clients but to you, you can see that you've got hidden 15 different deodorants, 3 perfumes and 4 family packets each of extra strong mints, polos and chewing gum. it's just standard procedure.
- It infuriates you how dirty your wax pot gets so quickly, so you set aside time regularly just for cleaning it. Starts off a chore, but then your OCD kicks in and you don't stop scrubbing until its sparkly and new again and once it is... the feeling of utter accomplishment you get is amazing. But trying to tell this to any of your non beauty friends just don't get it!
- At the end of a long day in the salon when you go to switch off all the electrical stuff, you're just about to leave but you're positive you've still left your music on. You haven't. But because you've heard the same CD playing 32 times today, it embeds in your mind and you can still hear it when it's not actually playing. Yep. That feeling.
- Those clients who come in for a shellac manicure and they sit there for 25 minutes debating colours. I fancy red today, but actually I really like that blue. Oh but that green with that glitter would look good wouldn't it. Meanwhile you're sitting dying inside that your next client is due in 15 minutes but you've gotta keep your cool. "I want a bright colour "she says. "Something funky". In the end she ends up wearing romantique. On all nails. Oh yes.... very bright and very funky. 🙄😏
- And then there's those clients who come in for lash extensions. During their consultation they will say "well I want them glamorous but natural glam" or "I want them really long but not too long as I wear glasses, but I want them like 4 times the size they are now but I don't want to look like daisy the cow" 😬😭
- When it's time to clean the spray tan tent and you touch the hose and the gun and end up covering yourself in tan so it looks like you've got some odd skin disorder!
- It gets seriously frustrating sometimes when you can do your own waxing, nails and brows etc. But those times when you literally NEED a massage and it's the one thing you can't do on yourself! Whyyyyyy!!!!
- You come home from work and your boyfriend/hubby wants to get fruity with you and asks you if YOU will massage HIS back?!?!? Erm no honey bee. Get down on the floor bow to me and massage MY feet more like!
Beauty therapy is an amazing career however. It's these funny occurrences that make your life so much better! What is the funniest thing that a client has done whilst in your salon? Pop them below and I'll maybe include them in an upcoming blog on the subject!